As a person, yes, I have changed. For one, the great
magnetic pull that I used to feel towards everything and nothing at the same
time, has disappeared. I was once Homer, my naked ears being tortured by the
sirens sweetly singing, and now, Now the thoughts don’t form words. Perhaps,
because there are no thoughts. I have
wanted to matter, for a really long time and now, perhaps, I do matter, only, it
doesn’t really matter to me. Like a tambourine, sniffing the whiffs of the
voodoo frills, wearing engulfing smiles that are drowning every gaze that an
ensnared eye would throw on them. Whether they’re themselves anymore, I do not know. If those
are Dave Mathews’ dreaming trees, the ones that I can see, the ones that a tiny
part of me wants to be, I wouldn’t know. They seem to be swaying, dancing to
melodious rhythms of what deafening sounds, but they don’t seem
to care. Yes, I want to be them. Swaying tall, swaying tall to the beat of
indifference. Perhaps, I am already one of them. Haze, ah! The one thing that
has been a constant in my life.
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